Sweet Dreams (Satire)

Satirisk Eventyr(16.Oct.2017) On this grayish Monday morning in mid October I feel like telling you about two presumably clairvoyant (by telepathy) dreams from last night. They were approx. like this.

1. I was in my appartment and saw a nearby or ajoining large room which was obviously some sort of a ball room.

The dancing male partners were mostly (or solely?) military leaders (officers or non.com.officers), being obviously happy and generally haveing a good time.

The music band was however placed in my appartment, and it transpired to be impossible for me to find a quiet corner to stay in.

2. I had a male visitor in my flat who took a keen interest in the content of my cabinets and drawers.

I then found out he planned to burglarize me. He was now joined by a girlfriend, and I coundn’t get rid of them.

Exposition. Obviously the first dream might naturally be interpreted as relating to a couple of (satirical) tweets from a few days ago.

a. A headline from bt.dk the 12.Oct.:

Rusland kritiserer Claus Hjort for “uvenlig” retorik.

Which I tweeted approx. like this:

“Rusland kritiserer Claus Hjort for uvenlig retorik”. Men det er vel dét, en krigsminister skal: Yppe kiv?


“Russia criticizes (Danish Minister of Defence) Claus Hjort (Frederiksen) for unfriendly language”. But isn’t that which a Minister of War is for: To pick a fight?

b. Likewise the 12th of Oct. but on b.dk you could read (approx.) this:

“I Ni måneder har Claus Hjort talt om skræmmende (Russisk) trussel mod Danmarks sikkerhed…” – which I tweeted like this:

Er Claus Hjort Frederiksen: En skræmmende trussel mod Danmarks sikkerhed?


Is (Danish Minister of Defence) Claus Hjort Frederiksen: A frightening threat to Denmarks safety?

Comment: Frankly it’s been difficult for me to take issue with Mr. Hjort and his discharge of office.

Which is perhaps mostly because I seem to always have had a soft spot for his modest, unostentatious, down to earth manners.

I suppose his demeanour reminds me a tad too much of the honest, frugal, hard working, very self reliant but also very unpretentious manners of my childhood hinterland’s small farmers.

I always respected these people immensely – and who, by the way, were the back-bone of the (now governing) party Venstre for many decades.

Nevertheless I must admit to being shocked by a Danish cabinet minister if he, as quoted, is perhaps trying to humiliate and enrage Denmarks mighty neighbour, the worlds greatest nuclear power – Russia?

A mighty neighbour that, as far as I know, since 1990 never did anything to hurt Denmark – perhaps more likely on the contrary?

Someone may now mention the “annexation” of Crimea. But please consider this:

The US/CIA/Mossad instigated and paid for a putsch – a dyed-in-the-wool coup-d’état! – in Ukraine, which with the help from local Neo-Nazis (and other (also foreign) groupings) removed the (unpopular, but) legitimate president and his government from office, replacing him with a Nuland-puppet.

Anybody remember “F**k-the-EU-Nuland” – then Assisting US Secretary of State for Europe?

The Crimeans didn’t want any part of this unlawful local “new-world-order” and voted overwhelmingly (90%?) to “leave Ukraine alone” and ask Russia for protection, and eventually to partake in the Russian federal state.

To blame Putin for this state of affairs might appear to be blody irony: In fact Putin did nothing – nothing! – to help the Cremea until they had voted to leave the Ukraine.

So trying to “pick a fight” with Russia for their “agressive behaviour” (against Denmark) seems to me to be well nigh incomprehensible.

Now, what about the dancing, “military leadership” having a good time?

Well, all telephones in parliament and government are ofcourse closely surveilled by foreign agencies. Primarily via ECHELON, which is run by NSA, and who is known to have a policy of relaying ALL RAW DATA to Israel/Mossad (in real time?).

Ergo – no secrets! If for instance a minister is told about one of my (satirical) tweets or blog updates over his phone and perhaps angrily comments on it – then CIA/Mossad will know almost instantly.

In this way said telephone talk might perhaps or even likely result in someone from overseas (A) calling f.i. an embassy (B) in Denmark – and a conversation like the following might – hypothetically – ensue:


A. Hello there, headquarter has got some important news for you.

B. Hello, thanks. Go ahead, shoot the works.

A. You remember this irritating little pain in the neck named G.? We just moments ago got news he is right now in very bad standing with Govt. Especially with the Ministry of Defence. You got that?

B. Sure, thanks, great news. I tell you we would like to teach this dumb peasent jerk a real good lesson once again. Thanks a lot A, have a nice day!

A. Sure, the same.

(B. now calls one of his phillipus friends (C) in the Frederiksberg City Hall)

B. Hello Pus, how’s everything?

C. Good, great, thanks. What can I do for you?

B. You remember this dumb, irriting twat G.?

C. Sure I remember, a real pain in the *ss.

B. Yes, thats right. We now have a chance to roughen him up a bit. I was thinking of perhaps making him real, real angry – and ofcourse also to burglarize him.

I’m told the Govt. would be only too happy. Of course they would like real much for us to do him in for good, but you know how slippery he is, cagey like an old rat. The pig!

C. Yes, but how come they would like to do him in for good? I thought that was something our people wanted?

B. Ofcourse, sure, sure. But you see, this dumb twerp has told the Govt. – via his blogs thats blacked out by Google, you know, so almost no one finds them – almost everything he knows. So if he’s done away with for good they – and we ofcourse – have a great chance to blackmail the shadow cabinet’s political top. So ofcourse they want him gone – and it couldn’t happen too soon, I assure you!

C. Good, but what exactly am I supposed to do, boss?

B. We feel it’s especially important to make him real angry so as to entice him to write totally uncouth things on his blogs and twitter accounts. Then when he has enraged enough people in high places f.i. with some harsh satires, we should eventually perhaps have a chance to do him in for good.

So here’s what you do. I’m aware you know how to pester him in his flat with loud, loud muzak, by day and by night. Please arrange that as soon as possible! Can you do that?

C. But certainly, I know all the people with phone numbers and all. Piece of cake, boss!

B. Great, but please go about it at once. And remember we’re doing gods work, and nothing can stop us! I’ll personally contact a couple of people right away to set him up for burglary.

Have a nice day Pus!

C. Gee, thanks boss, the same.

NB. It’s unclear what exactly the word phillipus is supposed to mean. Perhaps it most likely means horselover, or just horse, f.i. a Trojan horse or the like.



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